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t’s about that time, furlough time. It’s hard to believe that the two and a half years of our term are coming to a close. Years have turned into months. Months into now just mere days before we board an airplane and journey back home.
Some people have wondered if I’m sad to leave, if saying goodbye for 6 months is difficult. At times I have certainly felt the difficulty of saying goodbye to life here and closing the door on the work that has become such a part of our daily lives. At this particular stage, though, excitement, happiness and relief would be a more fitting description of what I’m feeling as we wait in expectation of this next chapter.
The anticipation of an upcoming furlough tends to make me rather reflective. It’s certainly an excellent time to look back on the past term, relive the struggles, remember the joys and pray about how the Lord would continue to direct us. It’s almost impossible not to have these recollections as constant companions during the final weeks of our time here.
Looking back on the past 30 months or so, it’s clear that there have been mountains and valleys, although the mountain passes often seemed too short, and the valleys seemed so long. I personally continued to struggle with tiredness, feelings of being overwhelmed, loneliness. Some might hear those concerns and say, “Get that girl back home, she’s not doing well!” And believe me, I had many of those thoughts myself. There were many times that I was literally on my knees asking the Lord to either take us out of this situation or provide some kind of lightening bolt of provision that would ease my daily struggles. Even in the midst of those prayers though, I sensed from the Lord that He was not ready to relieve me. I knew that good things were happening in the midst of this season and yet I sometimes wondered why I was called to this. I looked at the lives of others and saw the comforts and encouragements they enjoyed daily, things that seemed worlds away from mine.
At a point of intense difficulty the Lord placed in my hands some books written by a missionary who served in Asia about 50 years ago. As I read about Isobel Kuhn and her story, I was amazed at how similar our struggles were. An amazingly Godly woman who is already with Jesus has taught me much in this past year and I am thankful. One thing that struck me about Kuhn’s book, as well as books about Hudson Taylor and James Fraser (men who were missionaries to China and Burma in the late 1800’s, early 1900’s), was the personal battles that they faced in their early years of mission work. I’ve seen how the struggles they faced are still present in the lives of believers today and that passing through those early trials actually made them more effective witnesses of Christ throughout the rest of their lives.
Reading in 2nd
Corinthians just a few months ago, I was also amazed at reading words which
seemed to speak to me directly, words which brought clarity and light to my
darkness.
“We do not want you to be uninformed , brothers, about the hardships we suffered in the province of Asia. We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired even of life. Indeed in our hearts we felt the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead. He has delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers. Then many will give thanks on our behalf for the gracious favor granted us in answer to the prayers of many.” (vs. 8-11)
If I could choose a verse that would summarize this past term and what I have learned it would from the above passage, “But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.”If my God can raise the dead, then surely He can see me through anything. I can now conclude with this thought regarding the struggles I faced in this last year:
-Our family
had case after case of sickness and struggles with our health, “But this
happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.”
-A lack of
encouragement and true friends who lived close by often brought loneliness and discouragement, “But
this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the
dead.”
-Concerns about lack of clarity and direction within the church and in how the Lord would lead us in the future, “But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.”
(Here’s a picture of Ray looking concerned about the lack of clarity and direction within the church…)
Besides that, what have I learned? That when I have the Lord and His Word I can face anything. I don’t think I have yet had to learn a lesson that valuable or that difficult. But then again, growth comes in the storm doesn’t it? Not usually in the calm.
There is another aspect to the above verse that I have seen powerfully too,"On him we have set our hope that he will continue to deliver us, as you help us by your prayers." I am so thankful to those who have prayed for us, especially in the times we have been struggling. Truly there is no more valuable support that we could ever receive, ever. Thank you. It has been a blessing to partner with you.
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