Winter
What a blessing this cool weather has been! We are reveling in the daily gift of wearing sweatshirts and socks. I’m especially enjoying how nice it is to be able to play outside with the boys at any time of day without having to hide in the shade to keep the temperature bearable.
A few weeks ago as the weather was starting to get cool I was chatting with Ray about the change.
Hillary: “It’s starting to get cooler Ray, isn’t it? Soon it will be winter.
Ray: “What’s winter”
Hillary: “Winter is when the weather gets cooler and it’s also when we celebrate Christmas!”
Ray: “Okay.”
Hillary: “So, Ray, what do you want for Christmas?”
Ray: “A small orange toy.”
As soon as the question “Ray, what do you want for Christmas?” popped out of my mouth I knew that I had just made a big mistake. At 3 years old, Ray is the most impressionable person I know, just as 3 year olds are. Living where we do, far from cities, disconnected from other Americans or non-Thais, disconnected from television and shopping malls, Jeremy and I are the primary source of influence and information in Ray’s life. If he’s not hearing things from Jeremy and I, then it’s from one of his other friends who inevitably speaks Thai. Although Ray’s Thai language ability is improving, it’s certainly not as developed as his English and therefore he learns opinions, attitudes, everything from Jeremy and I. When it comes to Christmas and what this season means, Ray is going to form his expectations and joys based on what we expect and take joy in. That’s why I was frustrated with myself for asking him what he wanted, rather than explaining to him the incredible gift that he was given when Jesus was born.
A few nights later Jeremy and I were talking about what Christmas meant to us as kids. Despite the fact that we knew we were celebrating Jesus’ birth, we admitted that for us it was…..well, let’s be honest, it was all about the gifts. Few children would be able to sit and thoughtfully listen to the story of Jesus’ birth when there’s a huge pile of brightly wrapped packages under the tree. There’s too much competition during Christmas and inevitably Jesus gets left behind, forgotten in the midst of a day when we’re supposed to be celebrating His arrival.
As Ray and Rudy grow and change from year to year, so does the way our family celebrates Christmas and therefore the way that I view this time of year in my own heart. Ray’s first Christmas, at 2 months old, consisted of him staring at and being mesmerized by the lights on the Christmas tree. Unable to move or speak, he was really taking it all in. We were home for Ray’s second Christmas when he was a little over a year old and it was a precious time of having a little kid in the midst of a grown-up celebration. He obviously enjoyed all the gifts, and we enjoyed watching him. His 3rd Christmas at 2 years old, Ray was definitely beginning to understand that there was more to it all that just the gifts, but I admit that it was difficult to tie him down and get him to really grasp some of the true story. Just before his 3rd birthday it seemed that a window opened to Ray’s little heart and mind, a window of incredible opportunity where all of a sudden the communication of thoughts and ideas, fears and joys became a daily conversation. All of a sudden, it seems that this little boy of mine is able to wrap his mind around more than I realize. Back to the above conversation: When I asked him what he wanted for Christmas, he kind of looked at me with questioning in his eyes, “Why would mommy ask me what I want for Christmas?” That’s when it dawned on me that I had an incredible opportunity to begin forming in him a right and true attitude of Jesus’ birth and how it should be celebrated. If I told him it was about presents and asked him to make a list, he would believe me. If I told him it was about making 13 kinds of cookies and decorating the house with thousands of colored lights, he would believe me. If I told him it was about Santa and the gifts he would receive from the elves, he would believe me. I pray that the Lord would help me to choose to lead Ray along the path that leads to understanding that Christmas is about Jesus and a humble birth that changed the course of the entire world and that it was the first twinkling of light that would lead us to salvation, and I pray with all my heart, that he will believe me and carry that truth in his heart forever.
